Category Archives: rambling

So much stranger, so much darker, so much madder, so much better.

Well, it’s finally happened.

I kind of always knew it would, eventually, once I set my mind to it. It was just a matter of finding the time, which I did over the Christmas/New Year holiday. I saw this time stretching in front of me and thought, whatever shall I do with it? And I looked at my Netflix subscription and thought, well, YOU certainly have been going underutilized lately, haven’t you?

And I fell headlong into a binge I have yet to come back from. (And to be honest, I don’t quite know what I’ll do with myself once I’m finished, so I’d rather not think about that right now, thanks.)

Yes, it’s finally happened, people of the blog.

I am obsessed – BEYOND obsessed – with Doctor Who.

I even hear the theme music and I get all boppy. I've got it bad bad bad.

I even hear the theme music and I get all boppy. I’ve got it bad bad bad.

Now, I know in even writing this, I’m going to be getting comments from people who are all “I’ve been watching this since it STARTED and I’ve seen every EPISODE and I know THE WHOLE STORY and you know NOTHING, Jon Snow” (sorry, sorry, mixing up fandoms, there, I think that’s a excommunicable offense) so let me quantify this situation.

A while back, I watched the first two episodes of the reboot (with Christopher Eccleston) with some friends and liked them more than I thought I would. I meant to go back and continue with that, but my life often gets in the way of my life.

I’d never gotten into Doctor Who because it seemed weird and I didn’t think I’d GET it and it just seemed like one of those odd things that would confuse me if I tried to get involved so I thought it best if I stayed away. Like sports. Or playing an instrument. I AM OFTEN NOT GOOD AT THINGS THAT NORMAL PEOPLE EXCEL AT! It is a sad fact of life.

But then it became clear that almost every single intelligent person I knew was very, VERY into this show, and I needed to be watching it. Which almost made me NOT want to watch it – when everyone loves something, I immediately think, “Well, I hate fads” because I’m kind of a dick (I mean, you all seem to love that terrible Family Guy show, but the one time I turned it on to see what was up, they were making fun of domestic violence and I was so disgusted I never turned it on again, so what the hell, you guys?) but that backfired when everyone started ranting about how much they loved Serial and I avoided it for a while but then thought “What the hell” and downloaded it for a car trip and became SO OBSESSED with it and now look things up online about it ALL THE TIME because who DOESN’T want to know what Adnan and Hae really looked like, right?



And OMG, who DO we think killed her? I’m leaning one way, but I won’t tell you which in case you either haven’t listened yet (and if not, GET TO IT, SLAPPY!) or aren’t all the way done and don’t want me spoiling you. Also, my theory has more holes in it than Swiss cheese on the Titanic, you guys, and super-smart reporter friend at work and I were talking about it this weekend and his theory was SO SMART which is why he’s a reporter, I suppose, so now I am AT! A! LOSS! THERE ARE SO MANY WEIRD MOVING PARTS ON THIS CASE. Season two of Serial, please happen now, I want to fall headlong into another case immediately!

That was a very long digression.

ANYWAY. So I thought, “I will start watching this, what’s the worst that can happen” and now it’s been two weeks and I CAN NOT STOP.

NOW! Before I go ANY FURTHER! I have just started what I believe to be David Tennant’s last season so you are NOT ALLOWED to tell me anything that happens after this. I am trying very hard to stay spoiler-free. Unfortunately I’ve been a LITTLE spoiled, but that was before I started watching this and didn’t know I would ever care. So don’t comment all “In Episode Blah-Blah THE COMPANION IS REALLY A CYBERMAN IN DISGUISE” because I will be SO MAD at you!

Oh, BTW, I also finished "Arrested Development." I'm going to pretend the final season didn't happen. I wasn't impressed. Sorry, world.

Oh, BTW, I also finished “Arrested Development.” I’m going to pretend the final season didn’t happen. I wasn’t impressed. Sorry, world.

There’s really too much that I love about this show to go on about it in detail and you’re going to be split into two contingents, here, the ones that already KNOW it’s fantastic and the ones that don’t CARE and therefore have already tuned OUT, but I’m still going to ramble a bit. It’s my blog, I think I’m allowed.


  • It’s intelligent and goofy all at once. It makes me laugh AND it makes me think. Sometimes there are mysteries and sometimes it’s just funny and sometimes (most of the time) it’s a little bit of both.
  • The science isn’t TOO sciency. Andreas picked on me when I said I was watching this because the science wasn’t realistic but I don’t know much about all the science, anyway, so if they were being all realistic about it, I wouldn’t know what was going on. It’s just dumbed-down (and, yes, Andreas, probably wrong) enough that it’s cool with me, yo. (Andreas has other issues with the show, he just told me. I’ll let him tell you in the comments. You know what’s great about him? Well, other than everything? Even if we totally disagree, we still respect and love one another. That’s why he’s my Andreas, you guys. And I miss him and his whole family in the land of the Finns like CRAZINESS every DAY.)
  • There is totally romance and emotional things and I am ALWAYS WEEPING. There was one episode where I had to take a SINCERE BREAK from watching the show because I was EMOTIONALLY DEVASTATED. That’s a good show. I love a good cry. So, so much. Like, break out the Kleenex, here I am, and I’m in seventh heaven. (OMG! Speaking of which, the dad from Seventh Heaven was a child molester? Who saw THAT one coming, right? DISTRESSING!)
  • The Doctor makes me INSANELY HAPPY. He is joyous and childlike but also serious with the weight of the world on his shoulders and he has all the best lines and I love love LOVE watching him. I really enjoyed Eccleston but OH, am I head-over-heels for Tennant and his happy Converse All-Stars and bouncy hair. (I knew I’d like him – I’ve seen him in a couple of other things, the best of which being Hamlet with Patrick Stewart, which was BRILLIANT. I am being very all-capsy today. Why the hell did they waste him so much in that awful Gracepoint? So disheartening.) Tennant is beyond amazing here. I am already pre-mourning his loss. I don’t know if I’ll be able to fall in love with another actor in this role like I’ve fallen in love with him here.

    Loooooove. The most charismatic human being alive, sincerely.

    Loooooove. The most charismatic human being alive, sincerely.

  • I was informed I was going to hate Rose, but I LOVED her. I want all Rose, all the time. Yes, yes, apparently there are Companions upcoming that I will love very much (Martha was fine, but underutilized, yeah? It kind of made me sad. Also, all her PINING. Ugh, I think probably I related to her too much, but she started to make me cringe) but right now I’m all “BRING ROSE BACK DAMMIT” and having some issues with her being gone.

    Good grief, Googling Rose was fraught with spoilery. Don't do that unless you know what's coming up, my little gingersnaps.

    Good grief, Googling Rose was fraught with spoilery. Don’t do that unless you know what’s coming up, my little gingersnaps.

  • There are so many shows I can see took a page from this. There are elements of Doctor Who in so many of my favorite shows – Quantum Leap, The X-Files, Buffy (and a lot of Whedon’s work, actually, now that I’m thinking about it), Supernatural, this weird time-travelly show called Voyagers I used to watch when I was little…and there was totally a scene in one episode where I was all “THAT IS SO THE AMBER SPYGLASS!” and it TOTALLY WAS, per a quote from one of the writers that I read. They also reference pop culture things all the time (I’m sure half of the time I miss it, but when they did a shout-out to J.K. Rowling I laughed my ass off) and it’s just the perfect sci-fi/horror/fantasy/thriller nerd show in the entire planet.
  • You constantly get to see British actors and you’re all “I know that person BUT FROM WHERE” and you look them up and you giggle. Of course I knew who Simon Pegg was, but Carey Mulligan looked so damn young I couldn’t place her. And I had no idea the weird brash British chick from the American version of The Office was famous because of Doctor Who. Kylie Minogue looks old. I remember her in scrunchies and slouch socks. Also, the kid that plays Spiderman and is dating Emma Stone was in one episode (he was young) and whenever anyone was at a loss for what to do I kept shouting at the screen “WHY AREN’T YOU SAVING EVERYONE, SPIDERMAN?” Only I pronounce it “Spidermen” like Phoebe did on Friends. Like it’s his last name. “Irving Spiderman.” “COME ON, SPIDERMAN, SAVE THE DOCTOR ALREADY! SHOOT WEBS OR SOMETHING!” I would shout, and giggle gleefully. This scared the cat.



  • “Blink” is the best episode I’ve seen so far. Closely followed by “Doomsday.” The first is a very good standalone if you are trying to get someone into the series. The second would make no sense to someone unless they were following the series closely. One of these two episodes is the aforementioned cry-myself-sick episode; you can decide which one on your own. Play along at home, kiddos. Fun times.

    Not recommended to watch this at midnight all alone like I did. YIKES. Totally kept hiding my face behind my hands.

    Not recommended to watch this at midnight all alone like I did. YIKES. Totally kept hiding my face behind my hands.

  • The baddies are awesome. Some are scary (WEEPING ANGELS! Those Host angel thingies from the Titanic Christmas special!) and some are kitschy and funny (if the best thing ever isn’t Cybermen and Daleks having a snark-off, I don’t know what is, I laughed until I almost peed) and some are VERY EVIL AND WICKED BUT ALSO FUN (OMG, The Master, right?) Some, however, are just the worst. Who thought it was a good idea to make the brilliant and multi-talented Mark Gatiss into a scorpion-thing? What was up with that woman who was playing a giant red spider-creature as if she was maybe a drag queen trying to project to the back row of a large theater? If they bring her back, I’m boycotting that episode. She was TERRIBLE. I have to imagine she was either some famous British actress everyone loves for no apparent reason, or one of the producer’s wives. I kept asking her to shush it up. Surprisingly, she didn’t seem to hear me.

    Ugh, PLEASE let this be the last time I see this thing.

    Ugh, PLEASE let this be the last time I see this thing.

I really need to end this.


Big apologies, friends who were all “WHY THE HELL AREN’T YOU WATCHING DOCTOR WHO, AMY, YOU NUMBSKULL.” I am apparently attempting to remedy this by cramming it all in my head as fast as I can. Once this is done, the very kind Josh has informed me of the existence of Torchwood (oh, Captain Jack with your dimples, I can’t resist you) and other British shows I NEED to be watching, like, immediately. I think I know what I’ll be doing while Watertown is trapped in what seems to be some sort of eternal winter zone.

Oh, my. So pretty. So sexually and morally ambiguous.

Oh, my. So pretty. So sexually and morally ambiguous.

If you don’t spoil me in the comments, thank you. If you DO spoil me in the comments, I CURSE THEE AND THY OFFSPRING.

Also, I am willing to bet you before the month’s out I will be in possession of a tee-shirt that says “The Angels Have the Phone Box.” I have very little willpower and I need to sleep with that on my body.

Yep. It was really just a matter of time.

Allons-y. There are a lot of episodes left and they’re certainly not going to watch themselves.

A new year post on the actual day. Go me.

Happy new year, people of the interwebs! OK, so I missed New Year’s day for some of you. I know. I’m the worst at thinking in a timely fashion for other time zones. Please forgive me, other time zones. Here is a photo of Dumbcat looking pensive to make up for my transgression.

Hapey Noo Yere, peeple of bloge. I had a birfday this weeke adn am nowe fifeteene. In humaene yeers that is 76 yeers old. I shoulde reetire.

Hapey Noo Yere, peeple of bloge. I had a birfday this weeke adn am nowe fifeteene. In humaene yeers that is 76 yeers old. I shoulde reetire and get soceel securtee so Momee can stay homee and pet my furrs all the dayys.

A couple weeks ago at work, one of my most favorite coworkers (there are a lot of them…I kind of work with the best people in all the land) and I were talking about blogging. Here, I’ll give you our conversation. If he happens to read this (and I suppose he might, the internet’s a very small place sometimes), apologies in advance for stealing your words and putting them on the internets for all to read, one of my most favorite coworkers whose name I will not put on the blog because I’m about 99% sure it would embarrass the pants right off of you and I enjoy you so much I would never want to do that to you. Plus, also, workplace harassment, yo, I can’t be taking work-people’s pants off. I think there’s a seminar or something about that.

I seriously just snorted orange soda up my nose at this. This was NOT the image I went looking for, but look at the chick's face. It's like she's oblivious to the butt-groping. Or she's looking at a really funny kitten-GIF. Or maybe she just really likes the groping, I don't even know. Either way, it is my best thing of the day.

I seriously just snorted orange soda up my nose at this. This was NOT the image I went looking for, but look at the chick’s face. It’s like she’s oblivious to the butt-groping. Or she’s looking at a really funny kitten-GIF. Or maybe she just really likes the groping, I don’t even know. Either way, it is my best thing of the day.

Impressive Reporter Coworker: So I noticed the other day you’re a tweetaholic. You have over 20,000 tweets!
Me: Oh. Yeah. I used to tweet a lot. I don’t do that anymore.
IRC: Why?
Me: Oh, kind of a long story. I used to blog? And then tweet a lot, kind of in relation to that? I kind of fell out of practice.
IRC: You had a blog?
Me: Yeah. I kind of still do, I guess, but it just sits there.
IRC: What was it about?
Me: Um. Mostly me ranting about some things and making fun of other things? Also I talked about zoos a lot.

By the way, this happened a couple months ago in Syracuse. I like it because it looks like I Munchausen-by-Proxyed my penguin-baby and have gone cheerfully insane.

By the way, this happened a couple months ago in Syracuse. I like it because it looks like I Munchausen-by-proxyed my penguin-baby and have gone cheerfully insane.

IRC: And people would read it?
Me: Heh. Yeah. Lots of people would read it. I won some awards. And I met amazing people. And I went to Finland last year. Got to stay with people I met through blogging, actually. It was fantastic.
IRC: So…what happened?

And I didn’t have an answer for him. Not really.

What happened? Oh, I don’t know. Life, I guess. Andreas and I have spent copious amounts of time discussing that. Priorities change. Things change. People come in and out of your life. Moods rise and fall. Jobs come and go. I can most sincerely say that the person I was three and a half years ago when I started blogging isn’t the person I am now. I think back on that person and she seems like a complete stranger to me. It’s not that I’m embarrassed of her; it’s that I don’t know her at all, and I don’t know how I ever was her. I have a record that I was, I can look back on old posts and I know I wrote them, but as for remembering it, it’s kind of fuzzy. Too much water under the bridge.

So I’ve been doing a lot of thinking…and I realize there’s this itchy little part of me that wants to start writing again, and writing more. Otherwise I’m going to probably self-destruct.

I’m not juvenile enough to think resolutions ever stick. The first day of the year always seems so shiny and new, doesn’t it? Like you can accomplish anything. Like you have 365 days of newness (ooh, 366 this year, yeah?) to tackle and make your own. But I don’t know about you…but every resolution I’ve ever made has fizzled around February once you realize “oh, look, this shiny new year is very much like last year, what are the odds, yo.”

Instead, I’m going to be kind to myself, and promise myself I’ll do things that are good for me – and writing’s good for me. So writing here? Good for me. Writing poetry, essays, maybe even some short fiction? Good for me. And it’s good for my mind, because I need it to stop being so itchy. An itchy mind never did anyone any good.

(Side note: I have an amazing job, and every now and then I get to write. I got to write part of an article – FOR THE ACTUAL PAPER! – a couple months ago, and then got asked to write a LONG article for one of our related publications. A three-page article about traveling to Albany and all the things you can do there. It’s not online yet – will be eventually, and then you can read it, if you’re so inclined – but long story short, I get to write for work. I also get to do our social media, copyedit, proofread, and sometimes there’s totally a STOP THE PRESSES! moment with late-breaking news which makes me jump around in my chair because I feel like I’m in a 40s film with very impressive fedoras. My coworkers are fantastic, because they’ve totally accepted me even though I’m the biggest goofball. And I can say, with 100% certainty, I’ve never had a job where I can be more myself, and where I’ve felt more immediately at home with the people, than this one. Ever. When you can completely dork out about something three days in and no one even bats an eye? You have won employment.)

Sometimes I like to imagine that I'm in "His Girl Friday" only there's a lot less sexism (and also a lot fewer typewriters, ashtrays, and, sadly, fedoras.)

Sometimes I like to imagine that I’m in “His Girl Friday” only there’s a lot less sexism (and also a lot fewer typewriters, ashtrays, and, sadly, fedoras.)

I’m kind of rambling, here.

Anyway: I have a couple of people I’m going to encourage to blog, and they’re going to, in turn, encourage ME to blog, this year, so we’re responsible to one another as well as being cheerleady. And this will, hopefully, stop the brain-itching and get me back writing and being creative.

Happy New Year, internets. I hope your 2014s weren’t as fraught with weirdness as mine was (and most people I know had a TERRIBLE 2014, what’s going on, 2014, why were you so cursed?) and your 2015 looks like 366 (or 365, sorry, people of other time zones, I really meant to do this earlier in the day but I was too busy painting a unicorn head to go over my new fireplace…YES THAT IS REALLY A THING I DID TODAY, WHY ARE YOU ASKING) new and shiny days of awesome that you can tackle and wrestle into submission and make yours, all yours.

This is my unicorn head that is hanging over my fireplace. I don't have a name for him yet, but I'm leaning toward Reginald von Sparklenstein.

This is my new unicorn head that is hanging over my fireplace. I don’t have a name for him yet, but I’m leaning toward Baron Reginald von Sparklenstein.

Much love to your shiny little new-year faces. *smooch*

I’m just like Oprah, if she worked 6 days a week and was covered in cat hair.

Well, here we are, blog-people. People of the blog. Bloggonians.

Today I am attempting a fancy thing which is GETTING MY GROCERIES DELIVERED TO MY HOUSE. It’s a thing you can do here and I’m curious if it’s any good. This makes Dad SO ANGRY.

I'm glad a kid didn't come with my order, that'd be off-putting.

I’m glad a kid didn’t come with my order, that’d be off-putting.

Me: No, actually, I can. It’s a thing now.
Dad: You’re like a crazy hoarder now.
Me: What does getting groceries delivered to me have to do with hoarding? I promise not to stack the groceries along the wall. I will eat and/or use them.
Dad: I think hoarders and people with no legs get groceries delivered to them.
Me: It is a thing I am trying. I’m pretty sure I have legs.
Dad: You will never see people!
Me: I see plenty of people. All day long.
Dad: Not if you get groceries DELIVERED to your HOUSE.
Me: I’ll see the delivery man, I suppose. And what kind of people would I want to see at the grocery store? You know I hate people.
Dad: I suppose. I think getting your groceries delivered is WEIRD.
Me: Oh, like you wouldn’t do anything you could to avoid humans if you had the option.
Dad: FINE. What’s next? Are you going to send your laundry out to the CLEANERS? Are you going to hire a car to bring you to WORK? It’s like you’re OPRAH.
Me: Yes. Yes, I’m going to do all those things. Every last one of them. JUST LIKE OPRAH.

Look how excited Oprah is that we're secret twins. LOOK!

Look how excited Oprah is that we’re secret twins. LOOK!

So YES, just like Oprah, I am waiting for a grocery delivery. (I would think Oprah has someone take care of that for her, but I’m sure Dad knows best.) If it’s silly or doesn’t work, I will just not do it again, but I like the idea of picking out what I want online, ordering it, telling them when I’ll be home, and having them deliver it. It seems like a good use of my time. I probably should have called Oprah, asked what she thinks of this super-awesome delivery service. As we are both very fancy people and I of COURSE have her on speed dial.

I have days of excitement coming up; going to the vet tomorrow with the cats to make sure all is well (once, I went to my vet’s office, and the vet was Irish and the most handsome man ever. There seems to be quite a bit of turnover there and I never see the same person twice so most likely I won’t see him again, but oh, my, was he lovely. Sigh), then Friday going to dinner and a play with friend K. (and then running home right after to review it), and then Saturday it’s work all day, then Office Space drinkalong (or just group watch for those of us who are non-drinky, but still just as fun) with sj and crew in the evening, and then Sunday it’s road-trip day!

Yes. All roadtrips are this picturesque and the roads are all this empty of people. Hooray!

Yes. All roadtrips are this picturesque and the roads are all this empty of people. Hooray!

Off to Poughkeepsie to see C. and C.’s new house, and drive past the MURDER HOUSE!, and go to lunch, and then it’s off to Kingston to see Spring Awakening, which is only one of my favorite musicals ever. And C. has not seen it yet, so this is going to be VERY exciting! I get to see it with her for her first time! We could not convince her boyfriend to come with us, even though I explained that both sex AND lady-nudity were in this musical, plus a whole SONG where they use the word “fuck.” He was UNMOVED. Oh, the hatred of musicals is strong in this one! But I still get to see him when I see his new house and at lunch, so all is well.

SEX ON STAGE! It's really a fantastic musical. I'm the most excited.

SEX ON STAGE! It’s really a fantastic musical. I’m the most excited.

That is many things! ALL the things! ADVENTURES! Then I have a week of relaxingness (well, relaxingish, no more so than normal) then I think I have things going on the last week of March but I don’t know what they are right now other than I’m going to see one of my favorite people play Iago in Othello and I’m very excited about it because a., I haven’t seen Othello staged before, so that’ll be a treat, and b., if you haven’t seen friend N. act, well, you’ve missed one of the best things in life. Every time I see him onstage there’s just this glow you get from watching someone very talented do something they truly love really, really well. It’s kind of the best.

Ooh, Branagh. Sigh. So broody.

Ooh, Branagh. Sigh. So broody.

Oh, and I’m going our for Korean food with my theater ladies. We’re trying to do this monthly thing where we get together and try a new cuisine and chat and laugh and bond. So far we’ve done Indian and Thai and this month is Korean month! It’s fun and even anti-social me isn’t too freaked out by it. I am trying to do things outside of my comfort zone. It’s a thing I’m doing. I know, crazy, right?

When I looked up Korean food, a lot of photos like this came up. Is this what I'm eating? I'm tentatively interested in this.

When I looked up Korean food, a lot of photos like this came up. Is this what I’m eating? I’m tentatively interested in this.

Otherwise, in the land of Amyville, all is…the same, I suppose. Some things are lovely and some things are not. As, I suppose, things are in everyone’s life, right? I don’t know a single person with a life that’s all sunshine and flowers. The cats are good. Newcat keeps trying to eat Dumbcat’s face and I don’t approve because I like his face the way it is. I keep telling her to stop that. She ignores me in a particularly cat-like way. Dumbcat is mostly unfazed. He’s a pretty cheerful boy. I think we could all benefit being a little more like Dumbcat, to be honest. Someday soon I should be able to see The Nephew, which I am of course the most excited about. I got to talk to him on the phone a little the other day and he was the MOST adorable. He told me he was a racecar, and I said, “I bet you are the FASTEST racecar!” and he said, “YES I AM!” and vroomed off. I would like even the tiniest bit of that kiddo’s energy, I swear. He’s all go-go-go! ALL! THE! TIME! Then he crashes out and sleeps and then it’s time to GO GO GO again!

The groceries have been delivered. And Dad was right. I FEEL JUST LIKE OPRAH! The deliveryman (who Dad was SURE would be a knife-killer but was actually a very nice middle-aged man) even offered to bring them UPSTAIRS for me. I could not allow him to do that, I just felt way too lazy. Other than two things not being the things I ordered (not the end of the world, they were very CLOSE to the things I ordered, I may just have read the website incorrectly) everything was perfect, and other than the poor deliveryman getting lost (I live in a place with terrible signage) and calling me all nervous a couple of times, it went off without a hitch. OPRAH! We are BOTH so fancy right now, aren’t you so impressed?

I might be in and out here the next few days – so much going on! Perhaps not enough time for blogging! Who knows! – but I’ll be back all rejuvenatey next week. Or exhausted. Who knows. Life is just an eternal mystery, isn’t it? SO MUCH HAPPENING!

I searched "eternal mystery" and this came up. Well! This IS a mystery!

I searched “eternal mystery” and this came up. Well! This IS a mystery!

Oh, say can you see my eyes? If you can, then my hair’s too short…

It’s been a crazy week. Finally calming down now. I did ALL the things! All of them. Every last one. I know. It’s impressive.

Now I can relax a little and breathe and enjoy my real weekend that’s coming up soon soon soon. AND, in news of AWESOME, on Monday, which I have off because I work at an amazing place that gives actual holidays off, possibly for the first time in my LIFE, thank you new job that I love more and more every day and also MERKA for giving me a holiday on Monday, I will be hanging out with THE NEPHEW! His mom said he was asking about me the other day! I AM SO EXCITED! We will have some sort of adventure. I get to see their new house, and hang out with my favorite little guy. I’m very excited and totally counting the days. NEPHEW ADVENTURES! HOLIDAYS! I might just be so excited I’m flapping my hands all around like a looney.

Just in case you need your daily dose of the cutest little guy in the history of ever, here’s The Nephew and his very first snowman.

There might be cuter photos in the world, but I don’t know of them AND I DON’T WANT TO. Look at that FACE! SO HAPPY! I cannot wait to see him again!

ALSO, tonight, I treated myself to a real haircut. Well, I mean, my other haircuts in the past weren’t FALSE haircuts. They HAPPENED. But they were at Supercuts. Now, I’m not running down Supercuts. It’s fine, and you can get a haircut in like twenty minutes for about $20. So that’s nice, especially for busy poor people.

But it’s not like they do anything GOOD with your hair. You have a choice of “I’d like a trim” or “shave my head” or “give me a mullet” and that’s about it. And you kind of have to go in knowing what you want, because it’s not like you can trust them. You don’t know those people.

Or NOT every time, just when you're poor. Really poor.

Or NOT every time, just when you’re poor. Really poor.

So I’ve been going to the same stylist for years and years to make my eyebrows less scary. YES! It is TRUE! I have insane scary eyebrows. Left unchecked, I look like a crazyperson. I’m not even exaggerating. I’ve seen old photos of myself before I started getting them done and I say, “Oh holy hell why didn’t anyone TELL me I looked like that, my friends should be yelled at.” My stylist is wonderful and funny and affordable and I don’t trust anyone else in the world to make my eyebrows look like a normal person’s eyebrows. If your eyebrows look normal without upkeep, you are a lucky human. Thank your genetics.

I was trying to find a photo that looked like my "before" eyebrows but found this instead and now I'm just confused.

I was trying to find a photo that looked like my “before” eyebrows but found this instead and now I’m just confused.

So the last time I was there, I thought, I need a haircut. Everyone who leaves after having her do their hair looks not only beautiful, but happy. I’m totally going to splurge and have her do my hair. Because listen, I’m totally serious about this, I haven’t gotten a haircut in a year. A YEAR. That sounds like an exaggeration, but it’s the most true. The last haircut I got was last January. I remember and everything. It’s not like I’m haircut-averse, per se. I just don’t bother. I have other things to do. Plus my hair just does what it wants, so why bother, you know?

So I made an appointment with my lovely stylist and then she moved to a new salon and left me a panicky message all “You’re still coming, I hope?” and of course I was. I’ve followed her to two different salons, I’m happy to move to a third one as long as she’s there.

The new salon is FANCY, yo. They offered me a BEVERAGE. I felt like the time I got accidentally put in first-class on an airplane and I was all, “these cookies are all for me? this hot towel is for me? This whole big bottle of water is all for me?” because I am country mouse in the city. Always and forever.

Then I got fancy haircut. She said, “What do you want to do?” and I said, “I don’t know. What do YOU want to do? All I want is to keep most of the length, because I love how long it’s gotten. And something easy, because mostly I’m lazy. Otherwise, I trust you.”

She liked that a lot. That’s why she’s the best, because when I say “go to it,” she does. If you say that at Supercuts, you might walk out looking like a mental patient who got left alone in a room for twenty minutes with a Flowbee.



First she was all, “your hair has some natural curl to it. Let’s do something to enhance that.” Then she played with it a little more, and decided that no, she wanted to give it a blowout to see what THAT looked like. I was just along for the ride. I had never had anyone that excited about my unruly hair before.

So she put in pretty layers and blowdried it for a billion years (yeah, that’s…not going to happen in my life, that seems like a lot of work) and then taught me pretty things I could do with it involving twists and curls and bobby pins and mousse. These are things that I might or might not try at some point. I’m fairly lazy, hair-wise.

ANYWAY, I paid less than I probably should have for all that magic (YES, I totally gave her a tip, she works SO HARD and she’s a kickass single mom and I love her so much and she’s such a hard worker) and then I came home and just stared in the mirror and swung my hair around like a shampoo ad.

What’s that? You want to see? YOU TOTALLY CAN. (Well, if you follow me on Twitter or are my friend on Facebook or are my cat, you already did, but if you are just a PERSON, you can see NOW.)

Pretty and shiny and smooth! LIKE A BUSINESSLADY!

Also, I like this photo, it looks like I have a secret. I totally do, too. MULTIPLE secrets. NO, I won’t tell you what they are, then they wouldn’t be secrets, now would they.

And now I have to go to bed, because it is late late, and I have to go to work tomorrow and do work-things. As I do.

I’ve totally knocked a bunch of things off my to-do list over the past few weeks, I feel very accomplished.

Happy weekend, everyone! Enjoy, do many things, be happy, be safe, be brave, be fearless, love your faces.

(You totally win imaginary prizes if you got that the title was from the titular song of the musical Hair. ALL THE IMAGINARY PRIZES. Since they’re imaginary, dream yourself something awesome, yo. Also, hee, “titular.”)

Burning the candle at both ends, and possibly a little in the middle as well.

I wonder if I can get a little teeny tiny post written before I have to leave for work in half an hour? Let’s see.

This is kind of not even a real post but later in the week you totally don’t get posts due to all the busy-ness so take ’em as they come, darling sunshines, take ’em as they come. That’s what she said.

So it’s a week of running around like a crazy. I did/have to do the following:

  • see a play that I’m not reviewing, just for fun (it was very good)
  • go to dinner and a play with a friend (also very good, the dinner, the friend, and the play, quite a success all-around)
  • go to a committee meeting at the theater
  • get a fancy-schmancy haircut with a real hairdresser, not even at Supercuts, you guys, I KNOW
  • and of course still go to work and eat and sleep and such.


However, I have a two-day weekend coming up. I know you’re all “um, that’s just called a ‘weekend’ by regular people, Amy” and yes. Yes, it is. But since I work Saturdays, I don’t get real weekends. But I have Monday off! Martin Luther King Jr. Day! So that means this week, I get a REAL weekend! Two full days off! I AM SO EXCITED!

Oh, and side-note, the play I saw last night had a very very pretty man in it, who was a., tall, b., British, c., funny (that’s really kind of a trifecta, I told friend K. if he had a beard I’d probably have melted out of my seat) and after the show he apparently was trolling Twitter for mentions of the play, and he totally tweeted me, yo. So THAT was exciting. (I have a friend who works at the theater, and she saw him after the show, and said, “Oh, you must be the hot, tall one!” because that’s what we told her he was and he was apparently all embarrassed and flattered, so that’s nice, then. I think she should have found out if he wanted a green card marriage because I am not at all opposed to that. And I’m sure he could GROW a beard, you know? He didn’t seem to be particularly follicularly challenged.)

Tall, pretty boy is on the right. The other boy's not a ghoul or anything. He's fine. But the other one...sigh, sigh.

Tall, pretty boy is on the right. The other boy’s not a ghoul or anything. He’s fine. But the other one…sigh, sigh.

We are just about to the point where we pick next season at our theater, and then I have to start reading a billion one-acts that were submitted by the general public for our Playwright’s Showcase in July, and THEN I can finally read some things for FUN. Yes. I know. That probably isn’t the most exciting for anyone but me, but I’m totally stoked about it. I have a billion library books to read, plus all the books on my Kindle. They are all crying out for me. “AMY COME READ US!” they say, and how can I resist that, really? All those sad books?

OK. I have to go clean the snow off my car. And then drive to work. And the weatherman was all “IT IS SLICK YO SO SLICK” so I’ll probably have to drive slowly, then. Sigh sigh is the winter over yet? Happy Wednesday, people of the interwebs!

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