There was a big sign and a chain across across the dump saying, “Closed on Thanksgiving.”

Happy Thanksgiving, my little pumpkin pies! I hope you are all either stuffing your faces with all the deliciousness the holiday has to offer, or sitting around with your most loved ones, or doing something Thanksgiving-y. Volunteering. Sports-watching, or something. I don’t know, what do normal people do today?

I don’t Thanksgiving. Well, that’s misleading. I totally give THANKS, I just don’t do it with my FAMILY. I go home for Christmas (well, usually, that’s still to-be-decided around here this year) and it seems like a colossal waste of gas to go home two months in a row. Also, my family doesn’t do much for Thanksgiving. We do the same exact thing at Christmas, only there are gifts. So I choose Christmas. This year, Dad’s all jazzed because they’re eating the turkeys HE SLAUGHTERED HIS VERY OWN SELF and the last time I talked to him he was all “AMY AMY THEY ARE THAWING!!!” All hail the conquering hero! Also, Amy’s Brother and The Nephew might put in an appearance at the Thanksgiving table and everyone is all excited about that. (My brother also doesn’t believe in Thanksgiving. He usually sleeps through it.)

Aw, I always liked this Thanksgiving. TOAST AND POPCORN FOR ALL!

I will be working today because of ALL THE HOLIDAY PAY and also so my coworkers can spend the holiday with their families. I don’t mind. What else was I going to do, stay home and eat my TV dinner? (YES, I bought a turkey TV dinner, I’m not buying a whole turkey. Who’d eat it, the cat? There’s no way I can eat a whole turkey. I AM ONLY ONE PERSON.) Also, Thanksgiving is usually very slow at work. People are too busy digesting to bother the answering service, so that’s nice. I will be sitting at the supervisor’s desk and hopefully mentally plotting future blog posts or something, I don’t know. Something.

ANYWAY, it is THANKSGIVING, so you know what that means! GIVING ALL THE THANKS. I was thinking earlier, this has kind of been a really tough year. Not just for me, but for a lot of my loved ones. I think we’re all looking forward to putting 2012 in our rearviews and soldiering onto 2013. Only a little over a month left, chickadees. Also, I have to apologize, I assume the utter sucktacularness of 2012 has been my fault, because my 2011 was SO AMAZING I sucked all the goodness out of the upcoming year for everyone else so of course 2012 sucked because there was no goodness left. ALL MY FAULT. I send my most abject apologies for that. I’ll try not to bogart the goodness anymore, that’s totally rude of me. What an asshole I am.

BUT! Even though this year has really had its sucky pit-of-despair moments, there is a lot of thankfulness to be given. I’m not at all chipper-cheerful lady, but there is always a silver lining in almost everything. ALMOST everything. Not quite everything. I can think of a few things where there’s no silver lining at all. But this is THANKSGIVING and let’s not even talk about that right now.



  • My friends. I would not be where I am today without my friends,both the ones I can real-life smoosh and those of you that live in my computer. I have the best friends in the entire world. They send me tweets and email and texts and mail; they make me laugh and cry every day; they teach me new things; some of them OFFERED ME REAL-LIFE MONEY over the past four months, when they didn’t even have that much to spare; they are patient with how weird I can be; they are wonderful and funny and intelligent and I am the luckiest woman alive. Honestly, I have to wonder if I went so long without people because whoever’s pulling the strings in the world knew I wasn’t ready for these people until I got to the point in my life I’d be able to appreciate them, be the friend they deserved, and be ready to have them in my life. I’m not going to name them all; that’s poor form, and if you leave someone out, you hurt someone’s feelings. No feelings-hurting on Thanksgiving. Here’s the thing. If you’re my person, I tell you I love you. Often and repeatedly. Probably to the point where you’re like, “GAH AMY YOU ARE A SAPPY SAP.” So you know this paragraph is about you. I love you. Thank you for keeping me sane. Thank you for GETTING me. I owe absolutely everything good I have to you and would be nothing without you and couldn’t do this without you. You, you, you. Full stop.
  • Being let go from my job.I KNOW. This is not a normal thing that a person is thankful for. But as hard as I have to work to make ends meet right now, as stressed as I am, as worried as I am about making ends meet, as tired I am get – I never, ever, EVER have to go back to that place again. I never have to work with those people again. I never have to do another tax season again. I never have to sit in my car mentally psyching myself up to go back in by promising myself it’ll be Friday in only 4 more days, please don’t cry, Amy, only four more days. I NEVER HAVE TO DO THAT AGAIN. The relief in that feeling – it’s honestly immeasurable. When the first feeling you get when you get called into the conference room and are fired is not panic, but relief? You were at the wrong job. And it is not a curse, but a blessing. Also, had I not been out of that job, I never would have gotten the theater reviewing job, and the theater reviewing job is one of the best things in my life right now. So, old job, thank you. Thank you for letting me go. I only hope that someday, one of you sees me, and sees how happy I am to not be there, and that INFURATES you. (FINE. I’m thankful, doesn’t mean I’m not bitter at the way it was handled. I’m not a saint.)

    I never, ever, EVER have to be this person again. Can you imagine how free this makes me feel?

  • Having my part-time job to fall back on.Does it exhaust me? Do callers yell at me? Am I working weird crazy hours? Yes yes yes. But that job saved my life, sanity, and apartment. If not for that job, and how willing they’ve been since July to work with me (and work around any of my conflicts) and give me whatever hours I want/need, pretty much – I’d have had to move home with my parents, or borrow a ton of money from them, or maybe both. I’ve been able to retain my dignity because of that job. I’ve been able to pay my bills. I’ve been able to pay (MOST IMPORTANTLY!) my internet bill, because then how would I BLOG, you guys??? No, but seriously, if I ever find something else? That place is SO getting a huge floral arrangement delivered. (Also, thank you, coworkers. You make me laugh and are all kinds of awesome. Thank you for that.)

    Wish they did, but nope. I work. Hard. And pay ’em myself. Also, don’t hug me, I hate being touched.

  • My family. My family loves me even though I am insane and even though they don’t agree with…well…most of what I do or say. But they love me anyway. That’s nice, right? That there are people that love you no matter what? My dad makes me laugh harder than anyone; The Nephew is my absolute sunshine. I’m a lucky woman. I am very loved.
  • Having somewhere to live, enough food, a car, and the cat. These are basic things, but listen, a lot of people don’t HAVE these basic things. I am thankful for them. I am thankful for my teeny-tiny place that is just the right size for an Amy on her own, and I am thankful I have enough food that I don’t go to bed hungry (except when I eat at weird hours, but that’s no one’s fault but my own, it’s not like I’m STARVING), and I’m thankful for a car that goes when I need it to and stops when I need it to (and thankful for a father who bought it for me, because there’s no way in hell I could afford a car, or even the payments for a car, on my own), and I’m thankful that I have the world’s most amazing wonderful furry purry Dumbcat, who makes me laugh and cuddles me when I’m sad and has been just the best pet anyone could ever ask for over the past…shit, decade. Almost a decade with my little monster! Aw, yay!
  • Having amazing things happen this year, like the book and the theater gig. For all the weird upheaval and turmoil this year, it really has been an amazing year. I WROTE A BOOK. Which people seemed to enjoy, even! And it’s so damn PRETTY! It still makes me swoony, even three months later. I assume it will make me swoony YEARS later. And I am now getting PAID to write THEATER reviews. A newspaper is letting me see shows for free, then paying me to talk about what I thought of them and PUBLISHING them. In NEWSPRINT. These two things are just about the best, I can’t even lie. I might be kind of technically unemployed and tired and frazzly, but I’m a published author who writes for a newspaper. Sometimes I say that to myself and I giggle. And sometimes I say that to myself and I get tears.
  • Having theater in my life. Theater has saved my life since I was thirteen years old; it continues to do so. Theater brings such beautiful things into my life, often when I need them the most. Without it, life would be a dark void. Without even the slightest exaggeration. I am thankful for every single theater person that’s ever come into my life, ever production I’ve ever worked on, every theater group that’s ever embraced me and accepted me.
  • Where I live. I went a very long time living in places that just didn’t seem like home. Now I live somewhere that I love so, so passionately I can’t imagine living anywhere else, ever. It’s nice to not be looking over your shoulder for the next big thing so you can just live in the now, be happy where you are, put down roots. It’s a very nice feeling. A very settled one. I’ll never leave the Capital District. Well, I shouldn’t say never. Someday I’ll die, after all, and my grave isn’t here.
  • My sense of humor. I’ve been through some shit in my day, my little cranberries. However, for the most part, I’ve kept laughing. Even at things that were SO INAPPROPRIATE. I think it’s how I’ve kept my sanity. I’m a cat; I land on my feet. I might break a bone or two, but I land on my feet. And I land on my feet LAUGHING.
  • My (mostly) intact health and the health of my loved ones.I’m not the healthiest person in the world – I take a billion pills a day to ensure my continued not-dying – but I very seldom get colds, stomach bugs, and things of that nature, and I’ve only been to the ER four times in my life (once I was too little for it to count and once it was because it was Christmas and I forgot my pills four hours away and my dad was all “WE WILL GET SOME AT THE ER.”) My loved ones are, for the most parts, quite healthy as well. I am thankful for this. I am SO thankful for this. (Mostly because I’m a terrible sick person and I whine a lot.)

    TERRIBLE sick person. SO whiny.

  • Modern technology. My phone and my laptop allow me to keep in touch with my loved ones at speeds heretofore unknown; I can write things that people read almost immediately; I can see videos of The Nephew minutes after he’s done the thing; I can read what people are thinking about things from around the world as they happen. I know Andreas thinks we’ve all been cheated due to lack of flying cars, but I’m pretty down with this future, yo. Young-Amy would have LOVED this shit. (Young-Amy, however, would never have said “shit” on the interwebs.)
  • My big fat mostly awesome brain.For all of its quirks (MAYBE WE COULD STOP OBSESSING OVER NONSENSE ONCE AND A WHILE, AMY’S BRAIN!!!), I have an amazing brain. It’s smart, it retains knowledge, it makes weird arcane connections, it comes up with original ideas, it’s a quick learner, it loves words, it’s funny as hell. I like my brain a lot. Thanks, science, this brain was a good choice for me. Now, can we get it to stop the obsessery and also the worrying incessantly over shit? Thanks a billion.

    Pretty sure my brain glows like this. LIKE A NIGHTLIGHT IN MY SKULL!

  • The blog. This blog has been…well, don’t even get me started. When I started with this thing, I had no idea what would happen. What a monster it would become. What it would bring into my life: people, opportunities, laughter, love. I just thought, “Eh, this might be fun.” AND IT WAS. But it was also so much more. I am thankful for the blog, and for all of you for reading it, and reading all the other places my random things go up all over the internet. Without someone to read what we write, well, writing wouldn’t be all that much fun, now would it? Nope. Not at all.

Now I’m going to eat some turkey for lunch and a little teeny bit of pie (it’s not Thanksgiving without pie, yo) and listen to Arlo tell me about the shovels and rakes and implements of destruction, as I do every year, and then go off to work to make some money. Thankfully. Because I’m one hell of a lucky woman.

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone. I hope your day is utterly stuffed with love and family and food and all good things; you deserve nothing but the best.

About lucysfootball

I'm not the girl with the most cake. Someday. SOMEDAY. View all posts by lucysfootball

15 responses to “There was a big sign and a chain across across the dump saying, “Closed on Thanksgiving.”

  • becomingcliche

    Happy Thanksgiving! I love your list.


  • sj

    I am so teary eyed right now. Seriously. This post is amazing. <3 you, Amy. Really really happy that I know you now.


  • Kelly Naylor

    Dear Amy’s Brain: Come over here and chat with Kelly’s brain. We (What? You think there would only be one of us in Kelly’s brain?) will help you turn that obsessery bit into loads of fun! Come to the Crazy Side, Amy’s Brain! You can be Super OCD Woman’s sidekick. Or Partner In Crazy! Plus? We have vegan cookies. (Yes, we get them from Xs & Os, where else would we get the best vegan nummies?)

    Dear All the Other Parts of Amy: You rock! When you’re not making me laugh, you’re making me think thoughtful thoughts. All of that is absolutely the best of excellent goodness. Lucy’s Football is one of the things for which I’m grateful this year! (Did you see what I did there? I know you did. Other people go nutzo crazy when I’m prepositionally correct, but I know YOU appreciate it. OH! Another gratefulness!)


    • lucysfootball

      Aw, thanks. I just want to shut it off for a little while, though. That’d be nice.

      I do appreciate prepositional correctness!


      • Kelly Naylor

        I’ve tried turning the OCD off. It only has a few buttons, but people keep pushing them. So… I figured I’d have fun with it, and annoy the button-pushers at the same time. Bwahahaha! It’s a good thing I’m not a scientist or I’d be a stereotypical Mad Scientists. Being a database geek is a nice outlet for the OCD. Sadly, being a collaborative writer tends to make Super OCD Woman plot horrible things, painful and slow deaths, for some of my collaborators. Some of them (ok, only one of them, usually) do not even understand that SENTENCES NEED VERBS, unless it is an exclamation of some sort.

        Oh, dear… I feel the twitching begin just thinking about it. I know! I will soothe myself with the writing of some back stories for various characters. Me, myself, I and Super OCD Woman will string together words into proper sentences that will become lyrical paragraphs and, ultimately, some weep-worthy vignettes in the lives of Andrea and perhaps Talon and Evie (though she’s pretty boring) and Ni-Sha.

        Wheeeee! ( <— An example of an exclamation, which do not need verbs.)


  • Andreas Heinakroon

    Sorry, I’m a little late commenting. I don’t do Thanksgiving either, not being a Colonial and all, but I can appreciate wanting to give thanks for things.

    In retrospect, you seem to have had quite a good year, with plenty of stuff happening. Or perhaps I should say even with plenty of stuff happening (although some stuff that happens is good I guess).

    I won’t bug you with a list of my own (it would be mostly private stuff anyway), but I do want to say that I’m so very grateful that Little (then Baby) Girl woke us up that frightful time in March when her room was on fire. So many things could have gone so horribly wrong that night that I don’t really want to dwell on it. And I also want to thank everyone for their support during the time after the fire. I’ve got the best friends too!


    • lucysfootball

      ARE YOU AWAKE? Me too. Tweet me, yo, I just got home from work.

      You know, I totally almost put “Andreas not dying in a fire” on the list of things I was thankful for, but then decided maybe that was too depressing? No, seriously, I did.

      I am the most thankful for that, Andreas, you have no idea.

      You DO have the best friends! I know some of them!

      I think all my stuff that happened was to make me MORE thankful for the good stuff. I’m ok with that.


  • Heather

    Happy Thanksgiving, Amy! It’s Friday, which is when I’m at my most thankful–I’m thankful that I don’t have to cook a damned thing today, and that I can actually sit down. Holla!


  • padraicban

    And I am thankful for you! And your passion for theater and your supportive encouragement and love for me. I feel it baby. Thankful as well for your theater reviewing so you can share your passion with others and we can grow the Capital Region theater community until a day when we could sustain ourselves with. I have been to the mountaintop…And I’m thankful for your blog that teaches me all this about you and myself. 2012 has been a year. 2013 will be another but I like the road we’re on.


    • lucysfootball

      Aw, you. This made me teary. THANK YOU. I am so proud to know you. Whenever I see you I am just so happy.

      2013 is going to be AMAZING. I just know it! How can it not be? We live in the best place, we get to do the most wonderful things, and we know all the best people. We really live a charmed life. I don’t know how I got so lucky, but shh, don’t talk too loud, we’ll scare away the luck.


  • Kris Rudin (@krisrudin)

    I’m catching up on all your blogs since last week – was sick, and then it was the holiday and then, well, here I am, finally reading your Thanksgiving post! :I loved it! I like how you can be sappy and funny so that they blend together in a great mush of good emotions. I am thankful to have discovered your blog, and thankful that you are so diligent to post every day. AND thankful that things are really looking up for you (except for the weird job hours & such). I hope 2013 is just totally AWESOME for you!


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