I have VERY LITTLE TIME today. Got a late start! Well, an EARLY start. But late HERE, late. Have to leave for work soon and haven’t even started and a BILLION BILLION things are happening today and if I don’t pay the rent eviction’s going to happen and BUSY BUSY BUSY. Whenever I have a million things to do and I’m buzzing all around I think of Ricochet Rabbit. I don’t especially know who Ricochet Rabbit is, but Dad always used to say that when I was buzzing all around. “You’re like Ricochet Rabbit! Bing bing…BING!” And it would always make me giggle. I think it’s from some old-timey cartoon he used to watch or something. Wait, the interwebs can help. OK, the interwebs says that Ricochet Rabbit was from Hanna Barbera and used to say “ping ping ping” which kind of ruins my childhood. THANKS INTERWEB. But he DID used to bounce off the walls. Which I did. And do. Regularly. I think I might have some sort of energy disorder.
Ooh, look, per Wikipedia: Ricochet Rabbit’s catchphrase consisted of three quick pings; “ping, ping, PING!”, followed by him referring to himself in the third person; “Ricochet Rabbit!” The “Ping” is often mistakenly misquoted as a “Bing”. In the episode “Rapid Romance”, Ricochet clearly signs an autograph for a fan using the word “Ping”.
I like that even back in the day, people were over-watching and fan-wanking.
Also, these aired from 1964-1965. Dad was in his teens. I like to think of teen-Dad watching cartoons. That makes me smile.
OK, so quickly, what’s up in Amytonia. Amyland. Amyville. The Land of Amy.
Night shift has been night-shifty. People are NUTS. One guy pretended to be the president of the board of directors of a doctor’s office to get someone’s secret inside-line number (I WAS NOT FOOLED!); one woman was SO SHOCKED I knew her phone number (she’d told it to me, I’m not psychic) and one doctor lied and said he wasn’t on call because he didn’t want to deal with the caller’s problems. NUTS NUTS NUTS! All the fruits and nuts. Oh, we get some normal calls, too. People in labor and people with actual sick children and people who have pipes that have sprung a leak (NOT A EUPHEMISM.) And I am not getting enough sleep. But last night that was totally my own fault, I had this thing I wanted to do before I went to bed and it totally needed to be done and I thought, “do I do this thing? Because this thing, I want to do this thing. And if I do this thing tomorrow, this thing is not as timely or effective, and what have I gained, really? An extra 45 minutes of sleep? Weighing options weighing options WEIGHING OPTIONS I will do this thing.” And I DID. And so therefore I am sleepy, but satisfied with the choices I made. THIS IS WHY BEING A GROWNUP IS HARD.
In news of awesomeness, I have had a thing happen! But I can’t talk much about the thing. I am using the word “thing” a lot here. Again, not a euphemism. I have been offered (and accepted) a freelance writing position that I will be starting immediately. A freelance writing position that – get this, jellybeans! – PAYS MONEY. It is all very exciting and due to non-disclosure agreements and such I cannot say more. And it’s not ever something you will read (or would want to, really.) That makes it sound a lot pornier than was intended. And also kind of like I’m a spy. None of these things are true. ANYWAY, it’s a very exciting opportunity, and any money coming into Chez Amy at the moment would not be turned away at the door, no no no. Any money, including LAUNDERED and DRUG and PROSTITUTION money would be accepted, perhaps with a slight bit of worrisomeness, but whatever pays the bills, I suppose.
Anyway, once I know the timeline, there is a possibility that the old Football here will have to take a backseat for a bit. Or that these posts will have to be a photo and four words. Or just animated cat GIFs. Because lately, the time I have to write this is the only time I have at all, and that means the only time I’ll have to do the paid writing is the time I’ve been blogging. But, we’ll see. Maybe things will all fall into place like magic. Who knows.
Let’s see. I am a spoiled rotten brat and Dad is buying me a new TV for my birthday. Well, the spoiled rotten brat part I made up. I told him the TV shit the bed and he was VERY EXCITED about electronics shopping. Dad likes to buy electronics. He’s all “MEASURE THE BROKEN TV!” and “DIAGONALLY AND ALSO SIDE TO SIDE!” and “PUT YOUR PHONE ON SPEAKER SO I CAN TALK TO YOU WHILE YOU DO THE MEASURING!” And then he started talking about picture-tubes and flat-screens and going online to comparison shop and it’s like I gave him a little project for when he comes up this weekend. THANK YOU DAD! (Yep, I’m spoiled rotten. I know.)
Also, talking to Dad the day after a debate…that’s not really the best idea. There was a lot of shouting and “WE WON YOU LOST AS ALWAYS” and other things that I won’t repeat because I know my audience and I want you to continue LIKING my dad. So I just kept saying “I don’t want to talk about this I don’t want to talk about this I DON’T WANT TO TALK ABOUT THIS” and also “I think we have a bad connection static! Static! KKKKKKKKK” (that’s my static noise, like that?) and finally we started talking about the weather (RAIN RAIN RAIN) and then got off the phone. Oh, the next month or so is going to be painful, yeah? Sigh.
OK. Off to do things. Things things things. SO MANY THINGS. Bing bing…BING! (Shut up, who cares that it’s ping.)