It’s my BLOGGIVERSARY! Where’s my cake, dammit?

Whoo-hoo! We made it! A whole YEAR!!!

I’m totally stoked about this, you guys. A whole year of posting and insanity! 367 published posts! ALL THE CAPS LOCK!

I’d have some sort of confetti or something, but that shit’s messy. You just have to clean that all up. You know what I hate, by the way? People that include that kind of crap in cards. It’s the worst. Just the worst. You open a card thinking, hey, THIS IS NICE, a card! And then BAM! All the effing confetti falls out. No one likes to vaccuum, asshat. NO ONE. Especially not on their BIRTHDAY or whatever.

Anyway, before we get to the fun and craziness, I wanted to say thank you. Thank you for putting up with me for a whole year; thank you for commenting and tweeting and Facebooking and emailing and all the ways you’ve supported me this year. I’ve never been one to have “people,” and I always told myself I didn’t need people, so it was for the best, really. Come to find out: it’s really, really nice to have people. So, so nice. Better than I can even express. Sometimes something will happen and I will sincerely look up and say to myself, “Amy. AMY. This is your life. YOUR LIFE.” And then I’ll laugh. Because it is. Somehow, with magic and wonder and whimsy, this amazing life is all mine. And I wouldn’t trade it for anything.

So, thank you. Because I wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for all of you. I might be celebrating a year of blogging, but it’d be a quiet, solitary celebration. It certainly wouldn’t be an event that people around the world are celebrating with me. How did that happen? I don’t know. Shh, don’t question it too much. That’s when things go away.

OK, so you’re all here for the promised video and the BIG WINNER REVEAL, aren’t you? You totally are, don’t even lie. I made you a video. It’s like 9 minutes or something of me being a complete and total goofball. It’s pretty insane. I like it a lot. Dumbcat makes an appearance. 

Oh, before I put in the video, I wanted to say thank you to someone!

Rich, one of my commenters (check out his blog, I think you’ll like it) emailed me and asked if he could send me something to include in the prize package. Well, since the prize package is completely not even MADE yet (listen, it’s in the works, alright?) I was all, “YES PLEASE.” Also, because he contributed to the prize, he didn’t enter! Because he thought that would be unfair! How honest is THAT, right?

Rich has a store. It’s Rich’s Backyard Birds. You can check it out! Also, here it is on Facebook. Now, I know you. And you’re all, “RICH DID THIS BECAUSE HE WANTED HER TO PLUG HIS STORE.” Nope. He said I didn’t have to. Well, eff that, I’m doing it anyway. Know why? I’m obstinate.

Anyway, in his store, he sells this:

SAFARI ORIGAMI!!!

And he wanted to send it to me, because a., I love animals! and b., it’s paper! And it’s my first anniversary! So hence PAPER!

Aw, Rich. Thank you! You’re the best! The winner (TO BE REVEALED SOON!!!) will love it so much, I just know it!

OK, now…the moment you’ve all been waiting for…THE VIDEO OF CHOOSERY!

I have some things to say about this video, but I’ll wait til you’ve all seen it first.

TA DAH! WINNER WINNER!

Things to discuss about this video:

  • I look like a crazy. But in a fun way. Like a FUN crazy.
  • I really do have things hanging on my walls. Just not where you can see them.
  • When I told Dad I was making a video, he was HORRIFIED. “That’s how they get you,” he said. “THAT IS HOW THEY GET YOU.” Well, I guess that’s how you’re all going to get me. I’m done for now.
  • Dumbcat was behind me the WHOLE TIME and I didn’t even know it. I felt like Dumbhuman when I watched this back and saw that.
  • You all think I rigged that, don’t you? Don’t be jerky, I totally didn’t. It’d be nice to think I was some sort of criminal mastermind, but I can’t even think of how I’d go about doing such a thing.
  • I really am that goofy in real life. Not always. But a lot of the time. I have a LOT of ENERGY. Except when I’m asleep. Then I’m sleeping, obviously.

Here, in case you’re all “this is SUSPECT” I took photos of the other names in the bowl of CHOOSERY.

See? All on the up and up.

I even took a photo at ANOTHER ANGLE. All for you, Damien.

See? You were all in there. There’s really no way I could have cheated. IT WAS MEANT TO BE.

So! Your Lucy’s Football 2011-2012 Bloggiversary Giveaway Winner is…

Ta Rah Ta Rahhhh…

Z!O!M!G!

KEN!

Listen, I have no idea what’s happening here, but Ken trusted me enough to let me pull WHATEVER PHOTO I WANTED FROM FACEBOOK. Without knowing why I needed it or what it was for. Imagine trusting anyone that much? I can’t. I of course used this one because it’s like he’s airborne and it makes me laugh the hardest.

If I had unlimited funds I promise I’d send you all packages. As it is: Ken, it will be quite some time before you get your prize. You can blame the international mail system if you want, but mostly it’s because I haven’t even purchased the items for it yet, to be honest. But yeah, totally blame the postal system rather than me, that’s ok.

Congratulations, Ken. You are a WINNER. (I already knew that, by the way. I was ahead of the curve on Ken’s winnerosity as a human being.)

(Also, everyone cheer Ken on today, he’s totally playing music in public today! How excited are we? The most, is how much. However, since he is off ukuleleing, at the exact same time this publishes, he has NO IDEA he’s a gigantic winner. No, I didn’t even tell him. He’ll be as surprised as the rest of you. So he’s going to get off-stage and be all, “Why the hell do I have a gajillion tweets right now. OH AMY WHAT DID YOU DO NOW.” I imagine this is what a lot of my friends do on a regular basis. I’m like a madcap adventure of insanity.)

Ken, once you get your package, if you’d like to tell the interwebs what you got, that’d be exciting, because I don’t want to blog about it. I want you to be SURPRISED.

OK. Let’s wrap this up because at some point tonight I’d like to eat some popsicles and go to bed, what do you say? IT’S MY BLOGGIVERSARY! Also, it’s hot as balls here for some reason.

Thank you to my readers; without you I wouldn’t be here. Well, I might, but I wouldn’t be having as much fun as I am, that’s for damn sure.

A special thank you to my readers who also comment; I love hearing what you think and talking to you about it.

Thank you to the Geek Girls Book Club; you were there for me when I was a lost little chick all peeping away on the big bad internets, and you were (and remain) the most awesome geeks on the web.

Thank you to Susie, Jenn, Erin, and Cara, who let me blog with them. (When I’m not swamped with stuff. I PROMISE TO BLOG WITH YOU MORE SOON.)

This is beginning to sound like an annoying Academy Awards speech; I’ll wrap it up. TWO MORE I PROMISE. Don’t play me off stage, I hate that shit.

Thank you to my Twitter people; you help me keep my sanity daily. Most sincerely, I don’t know how I’d make it through without you.

And, most importantly of all, thank you thank you thank you to my loved ones. You know who you are. At least, I hope you do. I try to let you know as often as I can how important you are to me. Thank you for your emails and your DMs and your real live mail (I know! I get real, live mail from people!) and your texts and your support and the constant and amazing laughter you bring me daily. I don’t know what I did to get so lucky; I often wonder if somehow you’ve been fooled. Whatever it is, however I got you, trickery or whatever, please please stay. You make my life a better place. I love you all so much, I can’t even explain, because I’m totally that snotty annoying “I WON AN AWARD MOM!” person and I didn’t even WIN an award. 

I’m stopping now.

Thank you. So much.

Oh, I promised to give you the GENESIS OF THE ALL-CAPS. You probably think it’s something cool. Nope. It’s not, actually. Back when I started, I was all italics when I needed to emphasize something. As classy people do. But then I’d forget to go back and italicize what needed it, or even what I’d wanted to emphasize. So I started all-capsing what needed to be italicized so I’d remember to go back and italicize it later. But one day I got lazy and forgot to replace the all-caps with italics, and then realized, meh, it means the same thing to all-caps as it does to italicize. Plus it’s more fun and lets off more steam. Let’s stick with the all-caps.

AND A LEGEND WAS BORN.

BORN OUT OF LAZINESS.

Thank you for my past year, you guys. You’re amazing.

Let’s do it again, what do you say? Another year? Yes. Let’s.

I have exciting news coming up – big announcement coming up in the next month or so, which is really, really exciting for me – and lots of bon vivanting and craziness and, as always, ALL CAPS. And FOR THE LOVE OF PETE. And of course, Ding Dong Joe.

Love you all to pieces. Not even in the sarcastic way, either. Thank you for being my little jellybeans.

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About lucysfootball

I'm not the girl with the most cake. Someday. SOMEDAY. View all posts by lucysfootball

63 responses to “It’s my BLOGGIVERSARY! Where’s my cake, dammit?

  • ProfMomEsq

    Happy official Bloggiversary! Congrats to Ken. But, really, the video was worth the wait just to see Dumbcat videobomb you.

    Like

  • sj

    Okay, I totally made notes while I was watching to remind myself of things I wanted to comment on.

    “This is the bowl I make brownies in…and popcorn – but not at the same time because that would be gross.” haahahahahahaaaaaaaaa! Yes, that WOULD be gross.

    “Who knows how to edit? Not me!” I don’t either. No big. I think it’s a myth.

    “Cos I like ANIMAAAAAAAALS and PAPER!” Hee! 5y/o thought that was HILARIOUS.

    “Please don’t kill me now that you know my address.” 5y/o is very concerned for your safety now that you said that. “Mommy, no one is really going to kill her, are they?!”

    “Look, I totally have the fancy nail polish, I told you I did.” YOU DID TELL US!

    YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAY KEN! I LOVE that picture of him, too!

    I want him to be listening to this in his earholes because it fits with the background.

    I AM SO EXCITED TO FIND OUT WHAT KEN GETS!

    Look at me, all capattacky!

    Happiest Bloggiversary, Amy! <3 <3 <3

    Like

    • lucysfootball

      I love that I entertained your kiddo. I should make videos JUST to entertain the kiddos. It could be my calling. I’m VERY GOOD at entertaining the kiddos.

      (Please let him know that I don’t *think* anyone will murder me. I think I’m good. FOR NOW. No, wait, don’t tell the poor kid “for now.” Man, I’d be a terrible mother.)

      I have to fix my fancy nail polish. It’s a mess and a half of chips. New color! Tonight! I’m thinking blood-red. For TRUE BLOOD.

      That’s a great picture, right? I totally got the idea last night right before bed to include the picture and then thought, shit, I’d better ask Ken if it’s ok if I steal a photo of him from Facebook. He said yes. That’s trust, right there, ladies and gentlemen. I could have done ANYTHING with that photo!

      I loved that song. And the video. I don’t usually like instrumentals – I really need lyrics with my music – but that really was gorgeous.

      I am ALSO excited to find out what Ken gets. I wonder what I’ll decide on?

      Thank you, thank you! :)

      Like

  • elaine4queen

    THAT IS HOW THEY GET YOU

    your poor poor dad. how will he sleep knowing you did a youtube. (does he know what youtube is?)

    Like

  • elaine4queen

    OH! and by the way, that was so TENSE!

    now i understand why people watch sport.

    Like

  • Heather

    Happy Blogoversary! I’m soooo glad I found your blog and that I could be a part of all your wonderful, crazy, awesome-sauce stories. I’m looking forward to another year!

    YAY FOR KEN! Congratulations! How exciting.

    The video is FANTASTIC. Dumbcat is gorgeous. I got all teary-eyed at the end and had to pause it until I could see again. I’m so glad you’ve had such a great year, and I believe we should be thanking YOU for all of the laughs and good times. So thank you.

    I’m not really much of a hugger–I have a LARGE personal-space bubble–BUT you deserve hugs…lots of blogoversary hugs. So *HUGS*.

    Like

    • lucysfootball

      Aw, thank you! I’m so glad you liked it! I had so much fun making it. I think there might be more of those in the future. Too much fun, sincerely.

      I ALSO have a huge personal-space bubble. I get it. But I accept your hug. :)

      I’m so glad we found each other, too! Yay!

      Like

  • becomingcliche

    remind me not to invite you over for my famous popcorn brownies. Or brownie popcorn.

    Congrats, Ken!

    Like

  • Em

    Okay, so I have to go and buy things because I just moved and it’s a ritual. (The ritual of buying the kitchen curtains, the ritual of buying the new toilet seat, you know.) But I saw that it was your actual, real anniversary so I had to come and wish you a happy anniversary and also scan down to see who won (c’mon, you know we do that, right?) and then will have to come back later to actually read everything when it’s not 500 degrees out and is actually a handleable temperature outside.

    So happy anniversary! And also, break a leg Ken. And also congratulations Ken! I wish I could send you a cake!

    Like

  • Samantha

    Congrats to Ken! Hehe I liked your video. “But I won’t say her name, because that’s rude.” Dumbcat is a very pretty cat, although I understand his namesake. :D

    Happy, happy, happy bloggiversary! You’re awesome, and your blog is awesome, and blogg-ing is awesome. :D HAPPY SUNDAY! XD

    Like

  • Kris Rudin

    WINNER WINNER CHICKEN DINNER!!!!!! I laughed and laughed that it was Ken. I suppose it’s due to his natural Bon vivantity – he probably wins all kinds of drawings and raffles!

    I’m visiting my dad this weekend, and when I started playing the video he came over to watch. So I had to explain who you were, the bloggivesary, etc. So he watched the whole video with me. He liked Dumcat, because he’s a cat person, so I think you passed. But, unlike your dad, mine is not convinced the Internet is populated with assassins and spies! ;)

    You realize, don’t you, that you have set a bloggiversary precedent, now. Next year you’ll have to top this year’s drawing/video. And you’ve set the bar pretty high! ;)

    Like

    • lucysfootball

      I would think a bon vivant would win, wherever he goes. It’s true.

      Ooh, man, I’m glad I have a year to plan next year’s festivities. And I’m glad your dad wasn’t freaked out! :)

      Like

  • Andreas Heinakroon

    I got you some (virtual) cake. It’s on my latest blog post: http://heinakroon.com/2012/06/10/the-fabulous-fake-o-meter-2/ (by the way, this is not a plug – you can just skip to the Amy part about 2/3rds down). I think it’s sugar-free. (Well, as it’s a virtual cake, I just decided it’s indeed sugar-free.)

    Like

    • lucysfootball

      Andreas might not be plugging it, but I am. GO READ ANDREAS’S BLOG! It’s not only about me, but about humans and lying and it is FILLED with DELICIOUS SCIENCE!

      (Thank you, Andreas. I loved it!)

      Like

  • Andreas Heinakroon

    Aw, Amy! How fun to see you in the video! You look almost real and not at all internetty!

    And what’s that about unruly hair? It’s gorgeous, all 1940s styled and everything!

    Like

    • lucysfootball

      Almost real! YAY! That is WONDERFUL!

      Andreas! 1940s styled? That is the NICEST thing anyone has EVER said about my hair! Seriously, it’s just the worst. I wash it and I brush it. I don’t even style it. Because no matter what I do, it returns to what you saw in the video within an hour or so. I curl it: it goes flat. I hairspray it: it loses all hairspray, then goes flat. I put it up in barrettes: the barrettes slide right out. It does not want to do anything but what you saw in the video. So I just kind of gave up years ago and let it do what it wants. It seems to be all that works, anyway.

      But, aw! SO NICE! I’m all glowy.

      Like

  • Andreas Heinakroon

    I guess it’s ok for Ken to get the secret giveaway present. I already got a parcel from you and shouldn’t be greedy.

    Seriously, congrats to Ken! And happy blogoversary, Amy! Here’s for another great year!

    Like

    • lucysfootball

      Thank you! Here’s to Year Two being TWICE as good as Year One! :)

      Maybe someday I will send you ANOTHER package. You can never tell. I still want to confuse the post office people with your new address. :)

      Like

  • lynnettedobberpuhl

    Your. Hair. Looks. Fine. You are a nut! Very fun seeing you in live action! Your voice was a surprise, I have imagined you sounding like a college friend of mine, whose look and humor reminds me of you, but here you have your own! Who knew! You are very brave to do a video, I coincidentally just posted my first one ever, to demonstrate something, but you only hear me. No camera on this face! I could barely concentrate on what I was trying to say as it was. Yay for you on your Blogaversary, and yay for Ken with his prize AND his ukelele accompanied bon vivanting! I have learned and laughed a lot following you, and been deeply moved as well. Enjoy year two as much as year one!

    Like

    • lucysfootball

      I have a strangely low voice for a lady, I think.

      My hair just does whatever it wants. I do NOTHING with it. I wash it, I brush it. Pretty standard. I’m veeeery low maintenance.

      Thank you so much! I’m so glad you’re here. And I’m glad you liked the video. It was a kick to make. I think year two will be JUST as good as year one. Maybe BETTER! :)

      Like

  • lahikmajoe

    That was totally rigged.

    But to my advantage, so it’s ok.

    Like

    • lucysfootball

      IT WASN’T RIGGED!!!

      My parents both asked tonight who won. When I told them it was you, my mom said, “Well, you obviously somehow fixed it so he’d win.” I explained that I hadn’t, and she FINALLY seemed to believe me. “But how did that happen?” she said. “The odds were really against that, weren’t they?”

      Then I had to explain it might be due to the secret sibling magic thing.

      My dad just said, “Well, good. You like that guy. That’ll be fun. Just don’t spend too much money. Postage to Germany is EXPENSIVE.”

      You might have won over Amy’s Dad, after all.

      Like

      • lahikmajoe

        Won over Amy’s dad? Really?

        Well, let’s just avoid talking to him anymore about anything having to do with me. It can only go downhill from here.

        Like

        • lucysfootball

          Someday I’ll tell you about the conversation I had with him tonight. I need to email you about it. Remind me if I forget. Um – crap. I’m totally going to forget what it was. Remind me to tell you about getting choked up. I think that’ll remind me. If not, I’ll make something up. I’m good at that.

          Like

  • jbrown3079

    After watching the video, I can better understand how these lengthy posts can happen on a daily basis. It was such a hoot to watch. Yep, I said hoot.
    Everyday at 11:45 ,whatever I am doing, I smile because there will be something new from you.
    The problem for me is finding different ways to compliment you. I need a thesaurus.
    Anyway, congrats on the anniversary. And congrats to Ken.

    Like

    • lucysfootball

      Yay, I’m so glad you liked it! Yeah, I’m a little hyper. LOTS of energy, me. I can be quiet, when I need to be, but it’s certainly not my natural state.

      Thank you! I love that people are thinking of me at 11:45. That just makes my day. Sincerely.

      Like

  • Jericha Senyak (@JerichaSenyak)

    Bahahaha I also took notes because I wanted to remember all the funny. Except they were mental notes, and, um, although I know the popcorn bowl was one of them, I forgot them all when you got to Dumbcat and you were all like “He’s so cute!….” (long pause) “….he’s so stupid.”

    The fact that you talk EXACTLY the way you write is a thing of beauty and a joy forever, because now every time I read your blog I’ll be able to IMAGINE YOU SAYING IT. Like we’re hanging out. Which isn’t creepy at all, right? (No murdering, I promise.)

    Congrats to you for a year of blogging – you inspire me like whoa, and I hope you know. Also congrats to Ken! See, there’s no WAY you rigged it because we all know perfectly well that IF you had rigged it you woulda picked Ken, so CLEARLY you didn’t rig it because…um…I’m sorry, I need to go watch the Princess Bride now.

    Oh, and your hair? looks swell.

    Like

    • lucysfootball

      He really is so stupid. He runs into things. He falls off things. He meows TO himself, like he’s having a private conversation. He’s a constant joy and adventure, but he’s just not at all bright.

      I’m so glad you liked it. It was so much fun to make. I think YouTube videos might need to become a staple of the old Football hereabouts.

      I do talk very much like I write. I mean, I can be quiet, if I need to be. But mostly this is me. Kooky and loud and goofy. I try to get as much joy out of things as possible. Life’s too short for anything else.

      See, honestly, if I had rigged it, I would NOT have picked Ken. Not because I don’t adore Ken. I do. But because I got all scared people would say, “SHE RIGGED IT!” and then I was worried I’d have to deal with that and it would ruin the happiness of today. Luckily, no one did. Whew.

      Hee, thanks. I do NOTHING with my hair. I brush it. And sometimes I get it wet to tamp down the sticky-uppy parts. :)

      Like

  • Meg Granger (@MegsGranger)

    I can’t tell you how much I love that you said MULTIPLE TIMES in that video, “I won’t do [such-and-such], because that would be rude.” We could actually SEE your brain-to-mouth filter in action, and it seems to be in peak working order…aaand it made me giggle. So well done all around.

    Also, HAPPY BLOGGIVERSARY!

    Like

    • lucysfootball

      I was a little worried I’d screw something up and have to start all over again. I did NOT want to do that.

      Thank you! I’m glad you liked it. More videos, I think. I had fun and people seemed to like it!

      Like

  • Blue ghosty Obi-Wan (@little_oracle)

    you are brilliant, my dear. this wins for most awesome prize drawing video with an awesome kitty sidekick ever.

    Like

  • Andreas Heinakroon

    I must have been half asleep last night when commenting; I completely forgot to mention Dumbcat! (In my defense, I WAS very tired as it was after midnight for me (shut up, I’m old!), and I had been up since 6 am.)

    Anyroads, Dumbcat looks awesome, and he does that cat-thing where you can actually SEE him thinking: “Whoa, lady! What’s up with showing me up to the camera like that? I’m most seriously displeased!”

    Like

    • lucysfootball

      There’s nothing wrong with that. I’m in bed before midnight, too. I AM ALSO OLD.

      He WAS displeased. He was fine being on camera over my shoulder when I wasn’t aware he was even there, but the minute I picked him up, he was like “THIS IS NOT ON MY TERMS!!!!” and started digging. He’s a weirdo. We get along well, though, because I am also a bit weird. I know! It’s true!

      Like

  • lazyboo

    Aww, dammit. I’ve been so busy finishing up my semester that I missed the draw. Well, I still got the benefit of that awesome video. That moment when you pulled Ken’s name out of the bowl and just smirked… priceless.
    Dumbcat is the greatest. He’s so very cute, with those big wtf are you doing PUT ME DOWN eyes.
    Video was brilliant in so many ways. You really do blog JUST like you speak, it was hugely entertaining to hear you say all the things you write. And I love the genesis of the all caps story.
    Congratulations on your bloggiversary, that’s a hell of an achievement. I look forward to the year ahead (as well as the last two weeks of posts that I haven’t had time to read yet – it’s catch up time)

    Like

    • lucysfootball

      Thank you! I’m so glad you liked the video!

      I do talk like I blog. Sometimes I can be more serious, if I have to. But it’s a struggle. That was me in my natural state. :)

      Like

  • Elizabeth

    I have to say that you are beautiful and you make me laugh (and I cried a little at the end, cuz I’m a dork). Thank you so much and congrats to Ken!

    Like

  • blogginglily

    so rigged. . .

    Like

  • blogginglily

    oh. Also. . . how cute are you?? And that dumb dumb cat. You totally sedated him didn’t you? Also, you’re SUCH a crier!!

    Like

    • lucysfootball

      Aw, I’m not at all cute. I’m sturdy, like a dresser, or maybe a Volvo. I have an INTERESTING FACE.

      Nope, that’s him. He’s always that floppy. He’s a stuffed animal of a cat.

      I’m totally a crier. I’ll admit it.

      Like

  • Cara V. (@fictionalchick)

    Your video was so adorbs… and adding facial expressions to your humor just makes me LMFAO. (not the band). Grats to Ken!

    Like

    • lucysfootball

      There’s a band called LMFAO? Oh, that’s an ill-advised band name.

      Thank you! I had so much fun making that. I’m going to have to make more of those. I think they may become a thing. Yay! A new thing!

      Like

  • greengeekgirl

    Eeeeeeeeeee! I am so excited for you and your bloggiversary and everything. (I know, I have not been commenting AT ALL and I suck. I have been commenting IN SPIRIT. Or something.)

    KEN! You totally won! I guess it’s a good thing I didn’t enter, because I totally would have done all the winning and then Ken would not get his care package in Germany.

    I think we should all suggest things to go into Ken’s prize. Like a MIX TAPE. I just got one (digitally) from SJ and they are the best.

    Like

    • lucysfootball

      You’ve been busy! Not a problem!

      I can’t say what’s going in the package because it will ruin the surprise. But I will make a video before I package it up, and once I know he has it, I’ll post it so you all can see. Oh, and wait til you see. SO MANY FUN THINGS.

      Like

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