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WordPress, I would totally backseat makeout with you and steam up the windows.

I’ve been meaning to talk about this for a while, but got sidetracked by other things (seriously, my brain is a place of wonder and awe and shiny and sparkly but NOT VAMPIRES THEY DO NOT SPARKLE and bits and bobs and all things bright and beautiful and also some scary things under the bed with pointy parts) but then my wonderful long-lost sister @grngeekgirl reminded me that this was long overdue with her open letter to WordPress.com yesterday, which you should all go and read because everything she does is colored with awesome with a little additional tinge of added kickass.

If you’ve been here for any length of time (and if you have, hi! Thanks for sticking around, you’re the best! You and you and you and oh, wait, not you, PUT ON SOME PANTS, no one needs to see that this early in the morning, Nudity McGurk) you know that I switched over to WordPress from Blogger at the end of September. Yes, yes, this is going to be a totally boring post for those of you who don’t care a whit about blogging or whatever. But I’ll put funny shit in, ok? OK. Fine. Stop being all grumbly. Go eat an orange or something.

Now, when I started blogging, I knew NOTHING about it. Nothing. I can HEAR you, peanut gallery, back there saying I STILL know nothing about it, I am about to throw a SHOE at you. (SIDE NOTE! In college, I had a crazy professor, and he was weird about shoes being on the back of the desk in front of you. So if he saw that you’d propped your feet on the desk in front of you, he would stop class, point at you, and say, “SHOEEEEEEEE!” like he was in a Greek tragedy. It was funny, except if it was you, then it was scary. So you sat totally stiff and straight for the whole class so worried your traitorous feet would accidentally wander and then you’d get the “SHOEEEEEE!” treatment.) So when I decided I wanted to start a blog, I said, to myself, I said, “Self! How does one start a blog?”   And the answer I found, of course, was Blogger.

Why “of course?” Well, I’m Google’s bitch. I’ll admit it. I’m not ashamed. I love Google. I love everything about them. I love their mail and I love Google Chrome and I love their Reader and I love their documents and I’m sure I’d love Google Plus if I ever bothered to play with it and didn’t let it languish like a dying houseplant. Why wouldn’t I love their blogging software?

And at first, it was fine. You didn’t have many choices for customizing it, so that was alright. It was very basic and very simple and it worked fine.

I mean, “fine” in the sense that, I’d write a whole long post (I know, what? Not ME, not a LONG POST) and it would look totally awesome and I’d hit “preview” and then it would show it to me and the formatting would be gone. No formatting. All one gigantic chunk of text. No paragraphs, no sentences, just a mass of words. And you couldn’t fix it unless you went into the HTML tab. And listen, I know for some of you people, that’s like a totally easy thing to do, but for me, going into the HTML tab is like walking into a lion’s den wearing Gaga’s meat dress. I AM SCARED OF THE HTML TAB YOU GUYS. I don’t know how to use that. It’s why I stopped using Tumblr. Because I can’t figure out how to make my posts look pretty without messing with the HTML. And it’s scary. It’s like gangland territory back there.

But I dealt with it, because I didn’t know any better. And change is scary.

Then I started getting (GULP I KNOW) readers. And readers started commenting. And then the problems started.

Their comments wouldn’t appear, and they’d tell me they commented but I’d never see the comments. Google wouldn’t let me respond to my own comments; it kept telling me I was an invalid commenter. ON MY OWN BLOG.

I LOVE COMMENTS. They are my FAVORITE. I mean, not STUPID comments. But , truth be told, I get very few stupid comments. Well, spam. I get a lot of that. But real, true, stupid comments? Very few of them. I honestly have some of the most intelligent, most sarcastic readers out there, and I love them. So when they comment, I feel like I won the lottery of awesome.

Blogger was not only not going to let me have my comments of awesomesauce, it wasn’t going to let me RESPOND to my comments? I’m an invalid commenter? ON MY OWN BLOG? That I wrote? WITH MY OWN HANDS AND (debatable) BRAIN? NO NO NO BLOGGER.

So (as  I do with pretty much any major life change) I went to Twitter for help. (I’m pretty sure that if I ever get proposed to, I’ll be all “Just a sec, hon, gotta check this out with the minions” and then run to my phone all “Hey, Twitter, my SO just proposed – what do we think, hive mind?” And honestly, anyone who proposed would totally have to be cool with that. I mean, how many ladies come with their own set of minions, I ask you? NOT VERY DAMN MANY. It’s like falling in love with a PRINCESS with a RETINUE.) And Twitter was all “AMY. What the HELL. Why are you not on WordPress? It is AMAZEBALLS.”

So I went to WordPress and I checked it out. Here’s the thing. I am petrified of change. I mentioned that yesterday – petrified. PETRIFIED. I will keep doing something the same stupid wrong way just because it’s the only way I know how just because it means I don’t have to change it even though I KNOW it’s stupid just so it means I don’t have to change. I am a big weird weirdo about change. For example, I’m pretty sure there’s a quicker way to get home than the way I currently drive; it would involve me exploring a side road that I am not 100% sure where it leads. But I am scared to explore this road, because, well, I don’t know where it leads. What if it’s to Murderville? So for two years I’ve gone the same way. CHANGE IS SCARY.

But I was so mad at Blogger. SO MAD. And listen, when I get mad, I’m pretty much the bull with the red cape and all “ATTACK AHOY CONSEQUENCES BE DAMNED.” So I signed up for WordPress. Then I found out, for an additional $25 a year, you could get YOUR OWN DOMAIN NAME. Well! This was exciting! That made me feel official! Like a fancy blogger lady! And I’m totally poor, but I can handle $25.

I spent an entire day picking out a theme. Did you read @grngeekgirl‘s blog post? She’s totally right (well, about all of it, she’s one smart cookie) but about the themes, for sure. There are a KAJILLION of them. And I spent a whole day picking one out. But finally, I found one that I could live with – I’m not head-over-heels with ALL of it, but I like almost all of the functionality – and then moved onto the blogging.

But then! So many buttons! So many things that WordPress could do! And I kind of freaked out, because CHANGE SCARY CHANGE! But it’s surprisingly user-friendly, and I poked around, and found out how to import all of my old entries (which I am well-aware I need to re-format, because they still bear the signs of Blogger’s horrendous formatting, and I know I need to fix the categories and tagging nonsense, but listen, I AM VERY BUSY and sometimes I need to sleep or watch TV and eat popsicles IT HAPPENS) and then it happened.

I fell crazy in love with WordPress.

So easy. Formatting? Never a problem. Commenting? Never a problem. Want to immediately publicize your post on Twitter or Facebook? BAM IT IS DONE. Or don’t want to? That’s cool, too. The one nitpick I have? I don’t like that it automatically puts two spaces in-between paragraphs. I know, right? ONE NITPICK.

Also, this is a new thing that you can do. Ready? I’m trying this for the first time right now. I’m not 100% sure it’s going to work. BUT I’M TRYING IT READY HERE GOES.

ZOMG I totally somehow got new NEW Twitter today (although it keeps fading in and out STOP IT I LOVE IT I WANT IT TO STAY) and I can fancily embed Tweets THIS IS THE BEST LOOK HOW FANCIFIED.

(Also, the stupid was totally in the air yesterday, I’m not going to lie.)

Also, most of my favorite bloggers are on WordPress, so we can follow and like each other’s posts, giving each other a boost and putting a link to our blogs on each other’s blog in the process. It’s like a kick-ass club. Or maybe like the chess club, I don’t know. I was never in a kick-ass club so I don’t really have anything to compare.

ALSO, there’s a WordPress Android app that works brilliantly; the Blogger Android app was a piece of garbage that did NOTHING.

And, AND, there’s more functionality that I haven’t even PLAYED with. Like, I can put in a POLL. Which I’m totally going to do one of these days because I totally get a boner for statistics. Putting in photos is a breeze. Comments never screw up and I can totally respond whenever I want. The spam filter is awesome (although I get a lot more spam here than I ever got on Blogger…but that might be because WordPress is getting more hits than Blogger did, I suppose.)

When I was looking to switch over, I did a lot of internet research looking to compare the two (Blogger and WordPress) and found very little documentation telling me that YES, WordPress was far superior. So, in case anyone’s out there looking for the same thing I was a few months ago – let me say it in a number of ways, so that this will get picked up by search engines.

Blogger sucks.
WordPress is amazing.
WordPress is far superior to Blogger.
If you are planning on blogging on a regular basis, you owe it to yourself to get WordPress.
Using Blogger was like fighting with a very stupid animal or child and nothing got accomplished. You never need to fight with WordPress.
If you are looking to choose between WordPress or Blogger, choose WordPress for your own sanity.

So, yes, although my soul kind of is totally sold to Google, I am madly in love with WordPress and we are having a totally steamy side-affair where we throw things off the table and get it on up there and there is bruising.

Alright. Because I didn’t get any sleep last night and instead had insane dreams where I was back in high school, watching a mixed martial arts event (bout? match? what the hell do I know about such things?) in my high school gymnasium with this guy that I am totally not even friends with and I think we might be enemies now and he kept trying to make out with me and also let me wear his jacket because he thought I was cold but who’s cold in a GYM? And that dream went on for like a YEAR I SWEAR – I did not get enough sleep last night and now I have to go to a musical. I’m told it’s good, but I’m also told to not pay attention to things like some of the singing and/or dancing or I might laugh. So I think this might be an adventure.

Happy Sunday, minions!

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About lucysfootball

I'm not the girl with the most cake. Someday. SOMEDAY. View all posts by lucysfootball

40 responses to “WordPress, I would totally backseat makeout with you and steam up the windows.

  • The Background Story

    Google wouldn’t let me respond to my own comments; it kept telling me I was an invalid commenter. ON MY OWN BLOG—LOL

    Before we started our blog, we were choosing between blogger and WordPress. We found so many negative comments on blogger on forums so we opted to choose wordpress and we felt to “restricted ” by the limited themes in blogger. Hence we’re here and never once did we regret it :)

    Like

  • Andreas Heinakroon

    Mmm.. Orange..

    *rummaging through kitchen*

    Why don’t we have any oranges in the house?! Dammit!

    Like

  • Andreas Heinakroon

    No one should HAVE to use the HTML tab. I think that’s in the Geneva Conventions or something?

    You should be ALLOWED to use the HTML tab, though. HTML is kinda awesome, like grammar, but on steroids. Or speed. Or Diet Coke.

    Like

    • lucysfootball

      I like the idea of HTML, and wish I understood it, but it makes me feel idiotic, like looking at a page of Russian or something. It’s not a language I speak. And I like to know all the things, but have no time to *learn* all the things, unfortunately.

      Like

  • lisabrown1word

    tweeting you truncated, sister. ROCK ON

    Like

  • Andreas Heinakroon

    Hive minds are the best! Like, last night our baby girl had trouble breathing properly due to too much phlegm which made me panic a little, but my tweeps totally calmed me down and even gave me some sage advice. Thank you, hive mind!

    Like

    • lucysfootball

      Agreed! I have had so many questions, from important to mundane, answered by the hive mind over the past few months. I don’t know what people do without Twitter. I mean, Google only goes so far with some things.

      Like

  • Andreas Heinakroon

    Actually, like most mammals bovines are dichromates (not trichromates like us primates), so they wouldn’t really be able to distinguish that well between red and blue, as illustrated here: http://www.diycalculator.com/imgs/cvision-tri-vs-di.jpg

    Also, bulls are more agitated by motion than colour, even if it happens to be a high contrast colour like white or black (Yes, black is SO a colour! Shut up!).

    Like

  • lgalaviz

    First off… you know stuff now about writing a blog? I didn’t know there was stuff to know about blog writing. Is there a way of doing it right? Although, I am not that good at following instructions. Now that I know there is a way to do it right, I am fairly certain I am not doing it right.

    Like

    • lucysfootball

      I only know that WordPress is awesome and not to use Blogger unless you like frustration. I don’t know much else. Well, I know how to use caps lock. And to cuss inappropriately.

      I’m pretty sure you’re doing it right because I like you. If I don’t like a blog, they’re doing it wrong. It’s pretty simple. Also, you have a hammer, so you’re always right.

      Like

  • lgalaviz

    I got stuck with Blogger the exact same way. It was in the name really. I figured the thing with the name of the thing I wanted to do would be the way to go. Apparently not.

    Sometimes, continually wandering around with no clue of what I am doing has is advantages. I never worry about changes in blog formats and updates to twitter because I am perpetually confused by whatever is going on there already.

    I do remember Blogger changing formats at random so that every paragraph looked slightly different and I would have to go strip out all of the html code. Which would most likely frustrate a normal person, but evidently I don’t mind insanely inefficient use of my time.

    I really wanted to be able to respond to comments personally. Like Lucy’s Football, I also have a collection of the most awesome commenters ever. When you have commenters as awesome as ours, you must be able to respond to them accordingly.

    Like

    • lucysfootball

      I might have peer pressured you into switching. I’m the bad seed who’s luring kids behind the bleachers to smoke during recess, I think.

      We DO have the best commenters! How did that happen? I’m kind of awed by it. Also excited.

      Like

  • lgalaviz

    Also… having a hive mind AND minions is awesome. Who could want more than that?

    Like

  • Bronwyn Kelly

    +1 for Hive Mind! :D all the awesomeness of instant communication without the crazy Borg outfits! (okay, Seven’s outfit was pretty cool… but who looks like Seven? i couldn’t pull that shit off!) i look forward to vetting your future husband!! :D

    Like

  • Andreas Heinakroon

    I’ve been on WordPress from the start, and I like it very much. It’s got plenty of options for customising the appearance and functionality to make the blog really your own.

    Never used Blogger personally, but commenting on it is a bit of a pain. Sometimes there’s a CAPTCHA* and sometimes there isn’t and sometimes my WordPress login works and sometimes it doesn’t and sometimes, when on my mobile, comments I post just get lost in the dark and cold void of the internet, which, I’m sorry, really pisses me off.

    * Pardon? ‘What is CAPTCHA?’ You’ve already used CAPTCHA countless times and you hate it. Passionately. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/CAPTCHA

    Like

  • Mitchell Willie

    If you ever want to tame your fear of the HTML tag, check out Webmonkey. Their HTML cheatsheet has been helpful to me since it was first published.

    Like

  • Debbie

    OK, true story…I just commented on this using my phone, and the comment didn’t show up.

    What I said was, I LOVE reading your stuff. Remember that show “Blossom”? I totally hear your blog in my head as if it’s being recited by Blossom’s fast-talking super cute and enthusiastic BFF, Six (who names their kid Six? I remember Six’s explanation for her name )Dad said six is how many beers it took.” Ha Ha. But I digress…). Anyway, I can hear Six reading your stuff to me at a fast pace, with utmost enthusiasm and somehow, after you are sure you will not survive the whirlwind, it all makes sense.

    YAY you!

    Like

    • lucysfootball

      It didn’t show up because I have to approve them all first. Because of crazies! I deleted it, though, because you said you liked the second one better. I’m the queen of comment finagling!

      I will TOTALLY be Six. I loved Blossom. I especially loved how like every third episode was a very special episode of Blossom, where someone got molested or took all the drugs. I like to say “This is a very special episode of Blossom” when things get serious in the world. But I look really awful in hats. Can I be Six without a hat?

      Like

  • Debbie

    OK, see….now i have TWO comments…I like the second one better. And how do I get rid of the 80’s space invaders avatar and add one that sorta looks like me? Sorry for ruining your comment page with multiple rambling posts.

    Like

  • Omnibus

    The Space Invader pic looks better than what I look like IRL, so I’ll take it! Even though I can be a pain in the Asteroids! :)

    Like

  • blogginglily

    I chose Blogger for one reason and one reason only. I knew I could remember the website name.

    I imagined drunken evenings thinking, “i’d like to blog, but I can never remember the name of the site!” But with Blogger. Well, if you blog, then you are a blogger, and the rest just sort of dawns on me.

    I had that probably with “Live Journal” and that’s why I left. Because I could never remember where I blogged.

    Like

    • lucysfootball

      Here, I’ll make it easy for you. Open a WordPress account; bookmark the Dashboard page. Then you won’t have to remember WordPress. Although I’m sure you will. You’ll fall so head-over-heels in love with WordPress that you might get a tramp stamp of it. Seriously. You owe it to yourself. IT IS THE BEST THING. And I hate all the things, so that’s saying something.

      Like

  • blogginglily

    also, i hate the formatting on blogger, but I’m committed and loyal.

    Like

    • lucysfootball

      I’m going to peer pressure you into moving. MOVE MOVE MOVE. Seriously. If you move, you’ll be so happy. It’s like leaving a tunnel into the sunshine, migrating from Blogger. I’ll totally leave you a fruit basket if you move, like you do when you get a new neighbor.

      Like

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